This morning I woke up wondering why is it that Americans (particular white americans) call their parents by their first names as adults. Coming from a hispanic family, I don’t recall anyone in my family or in other hispanic families calling their parents by their first name. It has always been mami, papi, or some sweet nickname they have had for them. My husband and my sister in-law call their father by their first name. I asked my husband one day why he didn’t call his dad by dad and his response is that his dad pays more attention when he is called by his first name. I personally would feel so weird and disrespectful if I called my mother by her first name. It’s just so foreign to me and cold.
Why is there a difference in families because of our culture? Shouldn’t respect = respect, shouldn’t the ties of being a father and mother last past our adulthood?
Of course our views are different because of our culture differences but how can emotions be affected? Isn’t the relationships between parents and children a worldly thing? We all share the same pattern of being taken care of, meaning we were all babies, we were bottle fed at some point, cared by our parents, and eventually fled the home we were raised in. We all grew our wings and flew away. Well most of us. But why is it that we (hispanics, asians, non-americans) tend to have more of a sense of respect and devotion to our parents? Where and when did the American culture lose this?
The desire to fulfil our parents hopes for us, to give them what they deserve, to want to repay them for all their good deeds to us, a sense of gratification exists in non-american cultures more than in American cultures. Even when it’s regarding our extended family members non-white cultures have strong bonds with their extended family members. Why is there this distance within families in America? How did we get here? I don’t know but perhaps someone can give some input! 🙂